Thursday, April 30, 2009

Operation: Punchline

I decided to post here again because the font on my multiply isn't exactly pleasing on the eyes. This is a fan fiction I made last night, based off the award-winning comic book and later Hollywood film, Watchmen.  A more detailed explanation is given in the link on this sentence. Please do give your comments and criticism.


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Operation: Punchline

 

June 17, 1972

It’s been a long day. You’d think the large and roomy offices of the Watergate complex would be more than enough to provide ample ventilation. Precisely the opposite it did yesterday, most likely due to the horde of investigators that swarmed its hallways. We may have stumbled upon a plot that may rock the foundations upon which our country is built.

 

I have reason to believe that an as of yet unknown party has forcibly entered the Watergate complex, perhaps more than once, in order to secure information or material pertinent to the activities of the Nixon administration. Five people remain in [FBI] custody, and are at this time, are our primary suspects.

 

Although still partly based on conjecture at this point, I have inferred that this burglary, and the others that may have preceded it, are all part of a scheme brought forth by the Nixon administration itself. These burglaries may have been perpetrated to conceal proof of the yet-unproven illegal activities that many opposition factions commonly accuse the administration of. I believe that the activities unearthed today may finally lend such claims support.

 

The investigators and observers were a mixed lot. Among the first faces I saw on the scene were Bob Woodward and his associate Carl Bernstein. Woodward and Bernstein are talented journalists, if a bit unpopular. Previous articles opposing the Nixon administration have earned them numerous death threats from staunch supporters of the President. I have had, however, the honor of working with Bob [Woodward] before, last May, on an article concerning the attempted assassination of presidential candidate George Wallace.

 

Among the crowd were Nixon supporters as well. I instantly made out the gaudy appearance of G. Gordon Liddy. I wondered to myself why the [Commission to Re-elect the President] was so curious with the investigation. Liddy’s appearance added to my mounting suspicion concerning the administration’s involvement.

 

This suspicion almost immediately turned to silent fear as I laid eyes upon Liddy’s companion, Edward Blake. Blake stood out amongst the thin and wiry crowd of investigators and journalists like the proverbial sore thumb. This was especially because he was built like the equally proverbial brick wall. The last I had heard of Blake was his tour of Vietnam with the President, supposedly to fulfill his diplomatic duties in the [CRP]. It seemed he had returned with a souvenir; a large, deep scar running down his right cheek, supposedly due to an argument with one of the locals. If there were a single reason for me to deliberately lose all interest in this investigation, the fear of acquiring the ire of that man would be it.

 

June 19, 1972

Today was my first meeting with Bob [Woodward]. He suggested I take a pseudonym in order to conceal my identity. After much deliberation, I had settled for “Deep Throat”, from the title of a porn film that was theatrically released earlier this year. I confessed that I actually saw the film and found it amusing, although a woman having her clitoris in her throat seemed rather off-putting than erotic.

 

I had informed him of my suspicion that E. Howard Hunt, one of Liddy’s associates in the [CRP] was a conspirator in the break-in, based on his name’s presence in the address books of one of the five arrested burglars. I believe, however, that Hunt is not the only member of this operation, and that Liddy, if not the entire [CRP] is behind this conspiracy.

 

This remains to be seen, although I am optimistic that I can gain more information from the five suspects once they are transferred to a secure location at [the FBI Headquarters]. Getting these men to talk is just but another hurdle to delay the inevitable revelation that will finally expose the [Nixon] administration for what it is.

 

June 23, 1972

Fate dealt its first blow to the investigation today. [White House Chief of Staff H.R.] Haldeman accused me of leaking information to Woodward and Bernstein. I, of course, swiftly and adamantly denied this, and so far it seems that [my denial has] been bought. However, what Haldeman stated as my possible motive is what really bothered me. Haldeman stated, and I quote this in verbatim, that “he’s ambitious”.

 

Now it would be a complete lie if I had said I didn’t care about being promoted to Director [of the FBI], but there are things at work here much bigger than just plain self-subsistence. There is a deep and long-standing conspiracy that is sucking our nation’s funds and duping the innocent citizens who supply [those funds] which may have links to the government, and all people can think about is getting ahead at work? I sometimes wonder what’s happened to this country and ask myself if this is what’s become of the American Dream.

 

On a slightly more positive side, Frank Wills, the guard on duty during the break-in, found wiretapping equipment in the possession of the five burglars and has surrendered it to the authorities, giving [the FBI] complete jurisdiction in this investigation. I made the decision to finally move the suspects to [FBI Headquarters] for more in-depth investigation. Perhaps then I’ll finally get the answers I want.

 

June 25, 1972

The investigation has taken a turn for the worse.

 

En route to the [FBI Headquarters], the five primary suspects in the burglary were killed this morning. The armored car containing the five men crashed when its front tires were destroyed by sniper fire, causing the vehicle to swerve and crash into a parked car. The two guards assigned to the armored car immediately exited the vehicle, in order to gain more suitable cover, but both were swiftly dispatched with two .300 Winchester Magnum rounds to the head.

 

The suspects then remained in the car for safety from small-arms fire. However, our assailant, who is still at large, apparently came prepared and fired what reports claim to be a rocket-propelled grenade into the rear section of the crashed armored car. The explosion and subsequent fire killed the suspects.

 

I fear that the enemies that we are competing with are no longer limited to the political ideas of the government and those who support them. We have a man (or perhaps more) that is determined to make sure we take the information we have so recently unearthed to the grave, even if he is to be the one to send us there. And with his apparent supply of military grade weaponry, he could do it if he wanted to.

 

Suddenly, the race seems so much longer, and the hurdles, so much higher.

 

June 30, 1972

The past five days have more than made up for the loss of our prime suspects. While the charred corpses in the armored car that was wrecked in the skirmish with our still-unknown assailant can yield no more information, it seems that we may have gained all the knowledge that we may have needed from our late suspects in the form of a recording on a cassette tape retrieved from the front carriage of the car.

 

The car, aside from safeguarding the suspects, was also tasked with the responsibility of keeping their recorded interrogations for the duration of its trip. Fortunately, the cassette was not too damaged and the recording on the tape was recovered and remastered for its release to the FBI. On the recording, it was revealed that a few hours prior to the ill-fated trip, one of the suspects confessed that G. Gordon Liddy was one of the people who contracted him for the job.

 

Following subsequent investigation, Liddy was placed under house arrest, awaiting possible placement into FBI custody.

 

Despite the development of such a circumstance, I admit there is still work to be done. I am eagerly awaiting the announcement that would finally link the wiretapping equipment and the information the late suspects sought to control to Liddy. From there, we could blame this whole conspiracy on the government and finally expose the activities behind the Nixon administration. The final nail in the coffin is soon to be forged.

 

July 5, 1972

I have been so caught up in this conspiracy shtick that I decided to take a break. Lord knows I need the time to make sure I don’t get grayer than I already am.

 

Vietnam was finally made the fifty-first state yesterday, and quite ironically, on the fourth of July no less. In the evening, they held a banquet honoring the two superheroes who led Operation: Wrath of God and practically secured the greatest military victory the United States had ever had: Dr. Manhattan and The Comedian.

 

Manhattan was present, although as always, exhibited the apathy he had seemed to radiate these few years regarding his increasing involvement in military affairs. I mean, radiate alongside the glowing blue light of his skin of course.

 

Interestingly, The Comedian was absent, perhaps due to the fact that his secret identity has not yet been made public. I suppose it was for the best. I could not imagine myself sharing a toast and trading jokes with someone who in all other circumstances would be considered a war criminal and a rapist. And the fact that he’d been fighting in the employ of America since World War Two just made me shudder at the sheer volume of death this man is likely responsible for.

 

Even more interestingly, however, Edward Blake represented The Comedian at the awarding ceremony. Apparently, Blake had been one of the government [representatives] who maintained close contact with The Comedian and was one of the officials who suggested to him that he serve in Vietnam. I’d imagine two big and rough-looking guys like those two would get along nicely.

 

[Vice President Gerald R.] Ford awarded him with a cute little plaque composed of a pair of mounted and framed M1911 pistols and then shook his hand. It reminded me of those toys sold in novelty and comic book stores. Who knows? In a few years time something like that might actually pop up in those places.

 

July 9, 1972

This investigation has claimed yet another life. Frank Wills, the guard who played witness to the break-in was killed in a car crash this morning. A van had apparently tried to overtake Wills, but had “inadvertently” clipped the rear fender of his sedan, causing him to crash into a nearby car. The impact launched Wills from his seat and into the brick wall face of a nearby apartment.

 

The van quickly sped off and avoided the police long enough for it to be abandoned near a subway entrance with no trace of the driver. I doubt, however, that the driver of that van was merely avoiding a prison sentence.

 

I also doubt that this is any ordinary hit-and-run. The manner in which Wills was killed, makes this incident similar to the one which claimed the lives of our five burglars. Judging from of the impact the van made on Wills’ sedan’s rear fender, it is possible that the van’s driver deliberately struck Will’s car in order for it to sideswipe and thus crash. It seems like a professional car-disabling technique commonly employed by county sheriffs in those car-chase shows that have recently gained popularity. Whoever the [perpetrator] is, it seems he is trained in techniques available only to military and law enforcement personnel.

 

Furthermore, the driver disappeared without a trace into the subway system after abandoning his van. I highly doubt anyone just running from the cops after an accident would have the skill and presence of mind to do that. It had to be planned.

 

Whoever we’re dealing with is a highly skilled tactician and has access to the most exclusive of weapons as well as information about this investigation. All we have is the little time left to finish this investigation and the knowledge that will shake this government to its core. We suddenly have a deadline.

 

July 11, 1972

We finally have enough evidence to convict Liddy and successfully implicate the involvement of CRP in this conspiracy. Liddy was all too kind to rat out on his superiors after a long and bloody (I hope not literally) interrogation period. We can finally pin every single slush fund, illegal money transfer, and weapons deal on [censored] Nixon and his [censored] Cabinet.

 

I am on my way to meet Woodward in what I hope to be the final meeting in this entire “Deep Throat” masquerade.

 

Have we really done it? Have we really saved the ignorant populace from the conniving schemes of their government? Have we saved America?

 

July 13, 1972

Friday the thirteenth. The unluckiest of days. It is on this day that I resign myself to my fate.

 

Woodward and Bernstein were killed shortly after the stroke of midnight earlier today. Their bodies were found riddled with .45 caliber rounds, presumably from a pistol or a pair thereof, but due to the fact that their car was speeding, the shooter must have to be the best shot in the world to make those hits with such weapons.

 

The car they were riding in was set ablaze by the shooter before he fled, and unsurprisingly, he is yet to be caught. The numerous recordings, files and documents acquired by our dynamic duo were caught in that fire, never to be used for what they were intended.

 

In a rage, I stormed back into [FBI Headquarters] to retrieve every single remaining bit of information regarding the investigation, only to find out that it had all been handed over to the CIA, as they were placed in charge of any subsequent investigation.

 

What followed was a scuffle with one of the CIA agents who was hauling a large pile of files that weren’t even related to the investigation. He claimed that he was ordered to compile intelligence regarding recent events concerning the Nixon administration. I yanked the files away from him, and as they fell from his grip, one folder fell squarely on my table, as if on some sort of divine cue.

 

I quickly took the file and saw that it was on Operation: Wrath of God. I opened it, all the while cursing the agent on his apparent need for information on superheroes when he could always grab an issue of the Gazette for it.  In it, I saw a page that summed up his need for the file.

 

It was a photograph of a man in dark leather armor and shoulder pads [patterned after the American flag] brandishing a flamethrower and casually smoking a cigar as he watches a Vietnamese soldier burn to death. It was The Comedian.

 

And although he didn’t have his scar yet, I could not mistake that brick wall he has the [audacity] to call a human body for anyone else’s. It was Edward Blake.

 

It all made sense, like a long-awaited punchline being delivered on Monday Night Happy Hour. He had access to government hardware and his affiliation to the CIA through Liddy and Hunt gave him the information he needed to pull off his hits. And though I never had the chance to see his work myself, but I’d heard The Comedian was a better shot than any other man employed in this country’s Armed Forces, and he’s got WW2 and Vietnam to speak for him.

 

It was no wonder that we were getting the evidence we needed so quickly. Blake practically let us continue the investigation and then watched us so he could trace who was responsible for the investigation and then eliminate us all in one go.

 

I softly apologized to the agent and I made my way out the door. I drove home that night without running any red lights, something I’d often do to catch the rerun of the football game at 7. I didn’t stop for gas, so I wouldn’t have to the next morning. Lord knows I might not need it.

 

And now here I am, awaiting the stroke of midnight, when my Doomsday will eventually come. I write this now in the small chance that it may not be found by Blake and serve as notice that Richard Nixon and his associates have concealed proof of their illegal activities in office, and have murdered innocent civilians to do so. I write this now in the small chance that America may still be saved.

 

As for me, nothing can save me. I tried to be a hero for this country, and yet it wasn’t enough to beat a superhero. I tried to tell the country about the joke that is Richard Nixon and The Comedian didn’t find it funny.

 

God forgive me. God bless America.

 

July 20, 1972

 

Memorandum for:

The President of the United States of America

 

From:

George Gordon Liddy, Representative; Commission to Re-elect the President

 

Subject:

Operation Punchline

 

The CRP would like to inform you that the black operation Punchline has been a complete success as per your orders. The CIA has seized numerous files from the FBI and various police districts regarding the investigation of the Watergate incident as well as the involvement of costumed vigilantes in government-sanctioned operations.

 

All personnel pertinent to the investigation have either been detained or killed in the past week. Also, any of our members who were detained over the course of the investigation have been killed or released and in some way or another, cleared of all crimes linked to the investigation, such as yours truly.

 

I would like to commend the efforts of our extranormal agent, The Comedian, Edward Blake in performing majority of the assassination work required for the operation, as well as the disposal of sensitive information that would have likely ruined the image of your administration. Blake executed his job without leaving any evidence that may link the CRP to the operation, with his more public displays of force being attributed to the recent resurgence of costumed criminals.

 

It is here that I would like to ask for your opinion concerning future operations regarding the suppression of critical information concerning your administration, and on the application of extranormal operatives in such situations. On that note, I have included, among other documents, edited excerpts from the journal of one of Blake’s targets, FBI Deputy Director William Mark Felt, for your perusal.

 

On behalf of the CRP and Edward Blake, I congratulate you on avoiding a scandal that could have had the potential to prematurely end your term as President, and I hope to work with you again on a future operation.

 

 

 

 

G. Gordon Liddy

Representative, CRP

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Virginity Test

This test will try to "measure your virginity" in terms of a percentage. You start with a 100 percent virginity rating and must deduct 1 percent for each of the acts listed here which you've already done. This is obviously not a serious test, and should only be taken as a joke-quiz or something to pass the time.

Have you:
1.Smoked.
2.Drank alcohol.
3.Cried when someone died.
4.Been drunk.
5.Had sex.
6.Been to a concert.
7.Given a handjob/gotten a handjob.
8.Given a blowjob/gotten a blowjob.
9.Been verbally sexually harassed.
10.Verbally sexually harassed somebody.
11.Felt someone up and/or been felt up.
12.Laughed so hard something came out of your nose.
13.Cheated on a boyfriend/girlfriend before.
14.Been cheated on by a boyfriend/girlfriend.
15.Been to prom.
16.Cried at school.
17.Gotten lost in a WalMart or a department store.
18.Went streaking (running in public naked).
19.Given a lap dance.
20.Had someone of the opposite sex in your room.
21.Had someone of the opposite sex sleep over.
22.Slept over at someone of the opposite sex's house.
23.Kissed a stranger.
24. Hugged a stranger.
25.Went scuba diving.
26.Driven a car.
27.Gotten an xray.
28.Hit by a car.
29.Had a party.
30.Done drugs.
31.Played strip poker.
32.Got paid to strip for someone.
33.Ran away from home.
34.Broken a bone.
35.Eaten sushi.
36.Bought porn.
37.Watched porn.
38.Made porn.
39.Had a crush on someone of the same sex.
40.Been in love.
41.Frenched kissed.
42.Laughed so hard you cried.
43.Cried yourself to sleep.
44.Laughed yourself to sleep.
45.Stabbed yourself.
46.Shot a gun.
47.Trash talked someone and then acted like their best friend the next day.
48.Watched TV for 9 consecutive hours.
49.Been online for 9 consecutive hours.
50.Watched an animal die.
51.Watched a person die.
52.Kissed and/or messed around somewhere with at least 1 person present.
53.Pranked somebody.
54.Put somebody in the hospital.
55.Snuck into someone's room and/or your own room after being out.
56.Kissed somebody of the same sex.
57.Dressed punk.
58.Dressed goth.
59.Dressed preppy.
60.Been to a motocross race.
61.Avoided somebody.
62.Been stalked.
63.Stalked someone.
64.Met a celebrity.
65.Played an instrument.
66.Ridden a horse.
67.Cut yourself.
68.Bungee jumped.
69.Ding dong ditched somebody.
70.Been to a wild party.
71.Got caught stealing something.
72.Kicked a guy in the balls.
73.Stolen a boyfriend/girlfriend from a friend.
74.Went out with your friend's crush.
75.Got arrested.
76.Been pregnant.
77.Babysat.
78.Been to another country.
79.Started your house on fire.
80.Had an encounter with a ghost.
81.Donated your hair to cancer patients.
82.Been asked out by someone that you never thought you'd to be asked out by.
83.Cried over a member of the opposite sex.
84.Had a boyfriend/girlfriend for over 3 months.
85.Sat on your ass all day.
86.Ate a whole carton of ice cream all by yourself.
87.Had a job.
88.Gotten cut from a sports team.
89.Been called a wh0re.
90.Danced like a wh0re.
91.Been mistaken for a celebrity.
92.Been in a car accident.
93.Been told you have beautiful eyes.
94.Been told you have beautiful hair.
95.Raped somebody.
96.Danced in the rain.
97.Been rejected.
98.Walked out of a restaurant without paying.
99.Punched someone/slapped someone in the face.
100.Been raped.

Credits to DotAPortal for the quiz.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Best Sports Commentary in the History of Mankind

Just last month I made it my personal goal to watch all of The Undertaker's Wrestlemania matches before May, and I finished well ahead of schedule. Just before we go on, I'll clarify a few things.

1. Who is The Undertaker?-> I could probably go on and on about his accolades and how he's carrying the WWE (one of the premier professional wrestling promotions today) on his shoulders, but I'll just say he's one of the WWE's senior wrestlers, being 43 years old and having competed for 18 years now.

2. What is Wrestlemania?-> Every month, WWE holds one pay-per-view event where most of the storylines and fights between wrestlers either start or end (in contrast to their weekly televised shows). If a regular pay-per-view is given so much importance, Wrestlemania is most likely the most important pay-per-view event in not only the WWE, but in all of sports-entertainment.

3. What does Undertaker have to do with Wrestlemania?-> For all the 16 years he's competed at Wrestlemania, The Undertaker has never lost, and the list of wrestlers he has fought against is a very decorated list with Jimmy Snuka, Jake the Snake Roberts, Kevin Nash, Kane, Triple H, Edge, Ric Flair, and our country's very own Batista.

But that's not important right now. Right now, I am focused on two lines made by the commentary team during The Undertaker's then third Wrestlemania appearance against Giant Gonzales, which to this date is his only win at Wrestlemania by disqualification.

Click this link to watch the second half of the match.

Look at 6:59 to 7:02. As The Undertaker returns from backstage after being smothered with a chloroform soaked rag, Bobby Heenan shouts "He is living proof that . . . . . he is not alive."

I first laughed my ass off at this one. Believe me, an athlete like The Undertaker is no laughing matter. Unlike the steroid jockeys in the WWE today (cough)John Cena(cough), The Undertaker is not only big and imposing, but has the in-ring skill to back it up, with flying moves and submission holds that put people almost a foot shorter and almost 60 pounds lighter to shame. And his character is just terrifying. When I was a kid, I didn't check my room the Bogeyman or the closet monster, but I checked it for The Undertaker.

But when I heard this, this just took the cake. I mean, only in professional wrestling can a man be living proof that he is not alive. I'll bet one day, back in 2000, while recuperating from a groin injury, The Undertaker realized what Heenan said at this point and took that comment to be the inspiration to change his gimmick from a supernatural zombie-like figure to an actual living person. To the delight to some of his fans, he's just recently (like 4 years ago) returned to his roots.

But then look at 7:53 to 7:57. Randy Savage says "They're gonna have to change Giant Gonzales' name to What Happened."

That one speaks for it self. Way to foreshadow the two competitor's careers. Gonzales retired a few years after that match, his short career being punctuated mostly by his ludicrous height and ridiculous bodysuit. In contrast, The Undertaker went on to become one of the most revered figures in sports-entertainment. Leave it to Randy Savage to know when someone's career is going to fail then rub it in their faces years before it does.

I can't say this was one of the best of The Undertaker's Wrestlemania matches. It, in fact, has gotta be one of the worst, but the astounding and mind-blowing commentary made me enjoy this classic in a way different from the way I did the 15 other matches.

Friday, March 21, 2008

Fast Food Freestyle

In light of the recent McDonald's mishap, I'd like to lighten the mood and share one thing fast food is good for. That is, making raps about fast food. Here's a nice little youtube video I found showcasing an actual teen ordering from a fast food chain via rap.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FLn45-7Pn2Y

If you didn't catch that, the rhymes go like this:

I need a double cheeseburger and hold the lettuce
Don't be frontin' son no seeds on a bun
We be up in this drive thru
Order for two
I gots a craving for a number nine like my shoe
We need some chicken up in here
In this dizzle
For rizzle my mizzle
Extra salt on the frizzle
Dr. Pepper my brother
Another for your mother
Double double super size
And don't forget the FRIES...

If you ever feel the compulsion to piss off a fast food attendant, just for the thrill of it, this rap's sure to do the trick.

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

The Invincible Iron Man




One of the movies coming this summer which everyone should really be looking forward to is the the iconic Marvel hero's film debut, Iron Man. As for those who are unaware of the story, here it is. Industrialist, weapons designer, and billionaire playboy Tony Stark is wounded in the heart by a piece of shrapnel whilst kidnapped by terrorists, who demand that he make them a super-powerful weapon. Instead, Stark creates a suit of impenetrable powered armor, escapes his captors and returns to America. There, he refines this armor in order to protect the people he had inadvertently put in harm's way, due to his weapons, and becomes the Invincible Iron Man!

The trailer can be found here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Hx6TEqrzHU

Now I know recent Marvel films have had a track record of sucking horribly, like Spider-Man 3 and X-Men: The Last Stand not living up to expectations, Ghost Rider being a pure box office trash heap, and Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer being just a little bit better than the original, but I surely hope to God Iron Man won't be as bad.

First off, it's directed by Jon Favreau, the man who brought us "Elf", so we know the movie itself is going to be a really fun ride. Second, the supporting cast is highly star-studded, with Jeff Bridges as villain Obadiah Stane/Iron Monger, Oscar-winning actress Gwyneth Paltrow as assistant and love interest Virginia Potts, and Oscar-nominee Terrence Howard as the trusted Lt. Colonel James Rhodes/War Machine. And finally, the (Iron) Man himself, Tony Stark is played by Oscar nominee Robert Downey Jr. who not only handled the suit well, but held the lighter moments of the film as well, with superb improvised comedy skills.

While it may seem like a bad choice to have someone of Downey's age to play Tony Stark, Downey seems to make up for it with his own brand of humor, as well as his past experiences with substance abuse. Such experiences would of course help him continue to play Stark in the already planned sequels to the film, as Stark is a known alcoholic.

Hopefully the film comes together as planned. I'm really banking on this film to bring life back into Marvel Films, which since lost its light ever since Spider-Man 2, X2: X-Men United, The Hulk, and Fantastic Four were forgotten.

Knowing them, the film is going to be targeted where it counts most, at the kids who'd like a fun and enjoyable ride.

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

Tankmen

Before the return to the daily school grind, I just had to share this absolute golden flash cartoon series.

Now, Newgrounds is a famous flash website that hosts a variety of independently produced flash videos, games, and everything else you can make flash with. Their absolute notoriety aside (the mastermind of the Red Lake High School Shooting was a prominent poster on Newgrounds) they were recognized by their logo of a black-and-white man on a tank sitting against a yellow background.

Well, a few years back, someone decided to make a flash series based entirely on the premise of this iconic logo. The tankmen (in the series) are essentially black and white soldiers (ineptly) fighting for God knows what sort of cause. The series deals with the mishaps these soldiers get themselves into, and of course the very humorous exchange of penis-jokes.

I don't know how to post a video, so I'll put the youtube link below.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wluwslGu8hE
Enjoy.

Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Duality

Ever since the publishing of The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, fiction has always been fascinated with heroes and villains that have a certain nature of duality. It has been a common recurring element that heroes and villains in modern fiction are two sides of the same coin, with matching personalities, and similar goals.

Such examples include the Batman and the Joker. Both have undergone extremely bad days. Both have lost people they love. Both suffer from a sense of behavior and compulsion that one could describe as psychotic.

It is only in the manner which they treat such things are they different. The Batman is regaled as the hero, using whatever occurred in his past as motivation to aid the citizens of Gotham. The Joker, is reviled by the populace, using whatever occurred in his past as excuses to spread ironic suffering to the people of Gotham.

Another example would be Optimus Prime and Megatron. It was on the old Japanese editions of the Transformers that when the Autobot logo revolved, it would reveal the Decepticon logo. Furthermore, on their former lives on Cybertron, both Prime and Megatron were very respected leaders. Both Prime and Megatron only wanted the best for their fellow transformers.

However, it is how they try to approach their goals that makes them different. Prime wanted his Autobots to coexist peacefully with other races and to share a home alien to them with new, unique friends. Megatron wanted to destroy all life on a new planet in order to build a world all to him and his Decepticons. It would be fitting that both Prime and Megatron (in the old Japanese series) would be destroyed in the final, climactic episode, in a cancelling-out equation of sorts.

These things, are however, never seen in real life. There are always huge differences that set apart people. No matter how similar you say two people are, even twins, for that matter, the sense of duality is almost never present in real life.

That is because in real life, there's always a gray area. Life can never be seen as a two sided coin. Duality can only be conveniently found in the hands of an artist. And that, I guess, is to our blessing and convenience, because if there were any duality in life, well I'd guess we'd have long since destroyed each other.

I'll say that in order for people to coexist peacefully, we just have to accept that other people live too differently from ourselves for us to meddle in their lives. So much for duality then.